I'm Leaving

I still recall just what my mama said "You need an old-fashioned girl who makes breakfast in bed" And you are that and everything But then I must confess The bacon is burnt, and the eggs are a mess That's why I'm leaving the garden I'm sorry, but I have to go Oh darling, I'm sorry, but I have to Everything about you is as good as it gets You know just how I like it, especially the sex I should be happy as a king I would make you my wife But you can't even boil water to save your own life Or you could maybe learn to fry up some SPAM Don't know a pot from a pan Well right now my lovin' isn't on the table We gotta make it up as we go along Now that my lovin' isn't on the table We gotta make it on up, make it on up, oh One of us has got to learn to work in the kitchen But at this rate we’ll starve to death And that's why I'm bitchin' That's why I'm bitchin' baby That's why I'm bitchin' yeah That's why I'm bitchin' baby That's why I'm bitchin' yeah